Patron Saint of Snacks

celestial-sexhair:

bartimanus:

wontonpoop:

Pretty girls with long hair!! Stop cutting that shit off!! Boys don’t wanna date girls with boys haircuts!! Sorry!!

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the gif though

moonfalora:

rexuality:

a person complaining about puns basically invites every pun enthusiast in the vicinity to come snapping rhythmically from the shadows 

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strawberrieninja:


deceptidont:

Ok so me and kettle-black were having a conversation about sick bots, and then soundwave with laserbeak sitting on his head came up

Nesting Laserbeak wahh how precious 8 8

strawberrieninja:

deceptidont:

Ok so me and kettle-black were having a conversation about sick bots, and then soundwave with laserbeak sitting on his head came up

Nesting Laserbeak wahh how precious 8 8

cancerousmexicanfetusrapewhistle:

meladoodle:

imagine if your dad sent all of your anons

imageThanks dad you’re the best

Ah yes, the two most devastating of elements; fire…and orcs.
Party member after hearing that the castle town is under siege by orcs and fire (somehow unrelated)  (via outofcontextdnd)
Emperor’s New College

leavetheknockercrooked:

dj3y3:

tokyodoll13:

English Majors:

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Architecture Majors:

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Music Majors:

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Engineering Majors:

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Mathematics Majors:

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Theater Majors:

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Latin American Studies Majors:

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Linguistics Majors:

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History Majors:

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Religious Studies Majors:

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Law Students:

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Chemistry Majors:

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Women & Gender Studies Majors:

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Anthropology Majors:

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Sociology Majors:

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Philosophy Majors:

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Geology Majors:

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Economics Majors:

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Classics Majors:

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Government Majors:

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I fell apart at Government Majors

Where is the archaeology major?

belowtheprecipice:

cosmographia:

thepap64experience:

Mulan: The only Disney Princess with a body count… in the thousands

I yell this to anybody who misses in anything. 

a body count… in the thousands

fuckyeahsexeducation:

chameleonlady:

In health class today, we got a “what should you say back to somebody who tries pressures you into sex” worksheet. This is what I wrote. And below, what it says, in case you’re having trouble with the picture or reading my handwriting."Come on, just this once." - I’d rather have pizza and watch a movie. "What could it hurt?" - You, if you keep pestering me. "Everybody’s doing it." - Too bad I’m not everybody."If you loved me, you’d let me." - If you loved me, you’d buy me Supernatural on Blu-Ray. Hand ‘em over. "I promise we’ll use a condom every time." - *stares blankly until partner gets uncomfortable and leaves*"No one has to know." - No one has to know if I murder you."What are you afraid of?" - Spiders, needles, wasps, clowns, heights, murderers…"Don’t you love me enough to have sex with me?" - No."You’re just chicken." - *starts twitching wildly, making chicken noises, and flaps arms like wings*"Don’t you want to know what it’s like?" - Not with you."Everyone knows you’ve done it before." - I’d think I’d remember something like that."Maybe you just don’t like boys." - Yes, I’m a lesbian."Put out or get out." - Okay, bye. "I’m clean, I promise." - Maybe you should take a bath, then, just to be sure.

I love the response “not with you”
No one who tries to pressure you is worth your time.

fuckyeahsexeducation:

chameleonlady:

In health class today, we got a “what should you say back to somebody who tries pressures you into sex” worksheet. This is what I wrote. And below, what it says, in case you’re having trouble with the picture or reading my handwriting.
"Come on, just this once." - I’d rather have pizza and watch a movie.
"What could it hurt?" - You, if you keep pestering me.
"Everybody’s doing it." - Too bad I’m not everybody.
"If you loved me, you’d let me." - If you loved me, you’d buy me Supernatural on Blu-Ray. Hand ‘em over.
"I promise we’ll use a condom every time." - *stares blankly until partner gets uncomfortable and leaves*
"No one has to know." - No one has to know if I murder you.
"What are you afraid of?" - Spiders, needles, wasps, clowns, heights, murderers…
"Don’t you love me enough to have sex with me?" - No.
"You’re just chicken." - *starts twitching wildly, making chicken noises, and flaps arms like wings*
"Don’t you want to know what it’s like?" - Not with you.
"Everyone knows you’ve done it before." - I’d think I’d remember something like that.
"Maybe you just don’t like boys." - Yes, I’m a lesbian.
"Put out or get out." - Okay, bye.
"I’m clean, I promise." - Maybe you should take a bath, then, just to be sure.

I love the response “not with you”

No one who tries to pressure you is worth your time.

Congrats on 400 followers! Could I request Sparktimus (again)?

screwyourspacemagic:

optronixes:

last-flight-of-fancy:

Optimus often indulges in his long buried mischievousness now that he doesn’t have to lead anybody.

This is perfect in every conceivable way.

#getoutofthereOptimus

mongoliantiger:

connorkenwaydesu420:

mongoliantiger:

When i get my new arm cast im gonna paint iron man’s arm armour on it.

Or altair’s hidden braces.

Or connors braces

I dunno do you guys have any suggestions?

maliks left arm

kingcheddarxvii:

Not the heroes we thought we needed but the heroes we really needed all along

kingcheddarxvii:

Not the heroes we thought we needed but the heroes we really needed all along

queencous:

she’s cheer captain aND I’M JAVERT

turtletotem:

I have long said that in order for any comedy to truly succeed as a story, there has to be meat beneath the jokes. There has to be that moment when it is not funny any more.

This. This is that moment.